deeper roots

trying a new thing with audio ~ pulled some pieces below.

feeling: a very focused indoor fire keeping me warm, providing clarity

I've been feeling almost like this, burning at the seam sensation… more appropriately, in “door” language, it is like those cartoons or shows where you see a door that's closed, but in the open spaces that give you just a little preview of what's beyond that door, you see like bright lights and just action, as light. And you can feel that there's something big going on behind the door.

…the key initiation really began this year with this space, and it makes sense, so much sense that longing for deeper roots, for exploring my deeper roots, or my roots more deeply, more profoundly, starting that journey back to myself, that walking home process… I would seek plants.

I said, I want plant spirits to be the ones to hold my hands. I trust them to help me re-member the parts of myself that I need in this lifetime to accomplish what I need to accomplish, or want to accomplish. I trust them to grab hold of my hands and parts of me, to help walk me back…

I trusted that they would be that big door that would open a million doors after and that is how I feel this year. Feels like I have lived 800 lifetimes. That to me, in the language of doors, is I have chosen intentionally to walk in many, many doors that have led me to where I am now. And this was the beautiful, big green door at the beginning of this year, at the beginning of the most transformative year of this lifetime for me.

There is no expectation or performance that I have to put on for anyone, but maybe the frequencies of this initiation and this transition that's only been a few months, within a year, will resonate with someone, or will open a door for someone in some way… maybe just a window. Maybe it's not a full door where you step in with all of your intention, but you know the wind is blowing and you're inspired, and you're hearing the song, and it's taking you somewhere when you close your eyes.